Welcome to the Sharpesvale Chronicles, an ongoing neighbourhood story in The Sims 2!
Warning: this journal may contain uncensored nudity, violence, profanity and sexual themes.
Updates whenever I damn well please!
The middle of Chapter 317, now unscrambled for your viewing pleasure.
Yeah, you’re really really gonna want to read 317, 340, and 341 first. Just sayin’. With emphasis.
Brooke: WHAT is that SMELL?!
Aurora: Your hand?
Brooke: I don’t get it.
Aurora: I don’t doubt it.
Nerissa: Ouch. Leonard Murphy hair? On a woman, no less.
Nerissa: I mean ooh don’t you look pretty.
Penny: Hey, thanks Chief!
Nerissa: I was being sarcastic, you guys. Man she’s stupid.
Penny: If this is the kind of day it’s gonna be maybe I should just step off the roof.
Penny: Oh! Hello! Wait, that’s not right.
Penny: OH NO I’M SHOCKED
Penny: OH NO I’M SHOCKED FROM A DIFFERENT ANGLE
Penny: Okay, you’ve officially wasted my shock.
Penny: But I’ll forgive you if we leave it at this.
“Penny”: I’m not into being forgiven.
“Penny”: Also HA! You look stupid.
Penny: We’re on the roof of a POLICE STATION. What’s the next step in your brilliant plan?
“Penny”: It’s less of a step and more of a hop.
Penny: Why are you doing this?
“Penny”: I try not to corrupt my actions with reasons.
Jizelle: Zounds like rain.
“Penny”: Whoops, misjudged that one a bit.
Penny: Just leave me here, I’ll be fine.
“Penny”: Why would I want you to be fine?!
Penny: Please, not the ray gun again. It makes me feel like a Republican inside.
Penny: That was a joke about how conservatives have no soul.
I wouldn’t exactly call that a “joke.”
“Penny”: I hope I get to keep doing this long enough to find out if it ever gets old.
“Penny”: Hold on to your stupid shoes.
“Penny”: I really need to learn long-distance teleporting.
“Penny”: Although my precision is pretty damn impressive!
I’ll fucking say.
Chandler: VAT ZE SERIOUS FACK
“Penny”: Drop the fake accent, dude. We’ve already got that covered with a semi-main character.
Chandler: Here is the plot-specific item you requested.
“Penny”: Mysteries within mysteries!
“Penny”: Just because this part is unscrambled doesn’t mean it’s going to explain everything.
Penny: Oh, here comes the floor again.
“Penny”: I wish all our agents were as competent as you, Chandler.
Chandler: I used to run ENTROPY in these parts, woman.
“Penny”: And then you attacked an SCIA agent unarmed. You really want to dredge up old history?
“Penny”: If she escapes, I’m going to eat you.
“Penny”: Welp, back to the pig race.
Chandler: Let’s see if we can’t find a box your size.